The Muslim Home – 40 recommendations
Book by Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid
Contents
Introduction
Forming the household
Creating an atmosphere of faith in the home
Islamic Knowledge in the home
Meetings at home
Good manners at home
Evils in the home
The home inside and out
Introduction
Bismillaah il-Rahmaan il-Raheem
In the Name of Allaah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
All praise be to Allaah, we praise Him and seek His help and forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allaah from the evil of our own selves and from our evil deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides, no one can lead astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah Alone, with no partner or associate, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
The home is a blessing.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And Allaah has made for you in your homes an abode…” [al-Nahl 16:80]
Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Here Allaah, may He be blessed and exalted, is mentioning His complete blessing to His slaves: He has given them homes which are a peaceful abode for them, to which they retreat as a haven which covers them and gives them all kinds of benefits.”
What does the home represent to each one of us? Is it not the place where he eats, enjoys intimacy with his wife, sleeps and rests? Is it not the place where he can be alone and can meet with his wife and children?
Is the home not the place that offers cover and protection to women? Allaah tells us (interpretation of the meaning): “And stay in your houses, and do not display yourselves like that of the times of ignorance…” [al-Ahzaab 33:33]
If you think about those who are homeless, who live in shelters, or on the streets, or as refugees scattered in temporary camps, then you will realize the blessing of having a home. If you listen to a distressed homeless person saying, “I have nowhere to settle, no fixed place to stay. Sometimes I sleep in so and so’s house, sometimes in a café or park or on the sea-front, and I keep my clothes in my car”, then you will realize the disruption that results from not having the blessing of a home.
When Allaah punished the Jews of Banu Nadeer, He took away this blessing and expelled them from their homes, as He said (interpretation of the meaning): “He it is Who drove out the disbelievers among the people of the Scripture (i.e. the Jews of the tribe of Banu al-Nadeer) from their homes at the first gathering.” Then He said: “… they destroyed their own dwellings with their own hands and the hands of the believers. Then take admonition, O you with eyes (to see).” [al-Hashr 59:2].
There are many motives for the believer to pay attention to putting his house in order.
Firstly: protecting himself and his family from the Fire of Hell, and keeping them safe from the burning punishment: “O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which they are commanded.” [al-Tahreem 66:6 – interpretation of the meaning].
Secondly: the great responsibility borne by the head of the household on the Day of Reckoning.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah will ask every shepherd (or responsible person) about his flock (those for whom he was responsible), whether he took care of it or neglected it, until He asks a man about his household.”
Thirdly: the home is a place to protect oneself, to keep away from evil and to keep one's own evil away from people. It is the refuge prescribed by Islam at times of fitnah (strife, tribulation).
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Blessed is the one who controls his tongue, whose house is sufficient for him, and who weeps over his mistakes.”
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There are five things, whoever does one of them, Allaah will be with him: visiting the sick, going out for jihaad, entering upon his leader with the intention of rebuking and respecting him , or sitting in his home so that the people are safe from him and he is safe from the people.”
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The safety of a man at times of fitnah is in his staying home.”
The Muslim can see the benefit of this advice when he is residing in a foreign land where he is unable to change much of the evil around him. Then he will have a refuge which, when he enters it, will protect him from doing haraam things or looking at haraam things, and will protect his wife from wanton display and unveiling, and will protect his children from bad company.
Fourthly: people usually spend most of their time at home, especially when it is very hot or very cold, when it is raining, early or late in the day, and after finishing work or school, so this time should be spent in worship and halaal pursuits, otherwise it will be spent in wrongdoing.
Fifthly and most importantly, paying attention to the home is the most important means of building a Muslim society, because the society is formed of the households and families that form its building blocks. Households form neighbourhoods, and neighbourhoods form societies. If the building blocks are sound, the society will be based on the laws of Allaah, standing firm in the face of enemies and filled with goodness that evil cannot penetrate. Then Muslim homes will produce pillars of society who will reform and guide it aright, such as exemplary dai’yahs, seekers of knowledge, sincere mujaahideen, righteous wives, caring mothers and all other types of reformers.
Because this subject is so important, and our homes are full of so many shortcomings and evils and examples of negligence, this begs the very important question:
What are the means of reforming our homes?
The following contains advice on this topic. May Allaah benefit us from it, and cause the Muslims to focus their efforts on reviving the Muslim home.
All the following advice revolves around two things: achieving our interests, which is by establishing that which is right and good, and warding off evil, by removing that which can cause it or bring it into our homes.
Forming the household
(1) Making a good choice when choosing a wife
“And marry those among you who are single (i.e., a man who has no wife and a woman who has no husband) and (also marry) the saalihoon (pious, fit and capable ones) of your (male) slaves and maid-servants (female slaves). If they be poor, Allaah will enrich them out of His Bounty. And Allaah is All-Sufficient for His creatures’ needs, All-Knowing (about the state of the people).” [al-Noor 24:32 – interpretation of the meaning].
The head of the household must select a righteous and suitable wife based on the following conditions described in various ahaadeeth:
“A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty or her religion. Choose the one who is religious, may your hands be rubbed with dust [i.e., may you prosper]!” (Agreed upon).
“This world is all temporary conveniences, and the greatest joy in this life is a righteous wife.” (Reported by Muslim, 1468).
“Let every one of you have a thankful heart, a remembering tongue [remembering Allaah] and a believing wife who will help him with regard to the Hereafter.” (Reported by Ahmad, 5/282, and al-Tirmidhi and Ibn Maajah from Thawbaan. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5231).
According to another report: “A righteous wife to help you with your worldly and religious affairs is the best treasure anyone could have.” (Reported by al-Bayhaqi. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 4285).
“Marry one who is loving and fertile, for I will be proud before the other Prophets of your great numbers on the Day of Resurrection.” (Reported by Ahmad. Saheeh al-Irwa’, 6/195).
“I advise you to marry virgins, for their wombs are more fresh, their mouths are more sweet and they are more content with little.” According to another report: “… and they are less likely to deceive.” (Reported by Ibn Maajah. Al-Silsilah al-Saheeh, 623).
Just as a righteous wife is one of the four elements of happiness, so a bad wife is one of the four elements of misery, as it says in the saheeh hadeeth: “One of (the elements of) happiness is a righteous wife, who when you see her you feel pleased, and when you are away, you feel that you can trust her with regard to herself and your property. And one of (the elements of) misery is a bad wife who when you see her, you feel upset, she keeps attacking you verbally, and when you are away, you do not feel that you can trust her with regard to herself and your property.”
On the other hand, it is also essential to look at the situation of the prospective husband who is proposing marriage to the Muslim woman, and to agree to his proposal in accordance with the following conditions:
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If there comes to you one with whose religion and character you are pleased, then marry your daughter [or sister, etc.] to him, otherwise there will be fitnah and great corruption in the land.”
All of the above must be achieved through asking the right questions, verifying facts, gathering information and checking sources, so that the home will not be corrupted or destroyed.
The righteous man and righteous woman together will build a righteous home, because “the vegetation of a good land comes forth (easily) by the Permission of its Lord, and that which is bad, brings forth nothing but a little with difficulty…” [al-A’raaf 7:58 – interpretation of the meaning].
(2) Striving to guide one’s wife
If one's wife is righteous, this is a blessing indeed, and this is from the Bounty of Allaah. If she is not that righteous, then it is the duty of the head of the household to strive to guide her. Any of the following scenarios may apply:
A man may marry a woman who is not religious in the first place, because he himself is not religious at first, or he may have married her in the hope of guiding her, or under pressure from his relatives, for example. In these cases he must strive hard to guide her.
A man must also realize from the outset that guidance comes from Allaah, and that Allaah is the One Who reforms people. One of His blessings to his slave Zakariya was, as He said (interpretation of the meaning): “… and [We] cured his wife for him…” [al-Anbiya’ 21:90]. This curing or reforming may have been physical or religious. Ibn ‘Abbaas said: “She was barren and could not have children, then she had a child.” ‘Ataa’ said: “She was harsh of tongue, and Allaah reformed her.”
There are various means of guiding or reforming one’s wife, such as:
Paying attention to correcting her worship of Allaah in all its aspects, as will be discussed in detail below.
Striving to strengthen her eemaan, such as:
encouraging her to pray at night (qiyaam al-layl)
encouraging her to read Qur’aan
encouraging her to memorize adhkaar and remember the appropriate times and occasions for saying them
encouraging her to give charity
encouraging her to read useful Islamic books
encouraging her to listen to useful Islamic cassettes that can increase knowledge and strengthen eemaan – and continuing to supply her with them.
choosing good, religious friends for her, with whom she can form ties of sisterhood and have good conversations and purposeful visits.
protecting her from evil and blocking off all avenues for it to reach her, by keeping her away from bad companions and bad places.
Creating an atmosphere of faith in the home
(3) Making the home a place for the remembrance of Allaah
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The likeness of a house in which Allaah is remembered and the house in which Allaah is not remembered is that of the living and the dead, respectively.”
We must make our homes places where Allaah is remembered in all kinds of ways, whether in our hearts, verbally, during prayer, by reading Qur’aan, by discussing Islamic issues, or by reading different kinds of Islamic books.
How many Muslim homes nowadays are dead because there is no remembrance of Allaah, as mentioned in the hadeeth. What must they be like when all that is heard therein is the music of Shaytaan with instruments and singing, and backbiting, slander and gossip?
What must they be like when they are filled with evil and sin, such as the haraam mixing of the sexes and wanton display between relatives who are not mahram or with neighbours who enter the home?
How can the angels enter a home like this? Revive your homes with all kinds of dhikr, may Allaah have mercy on you!
(4) Make your homes a qiblah
What is meant is taking the home as a place of worship.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And We inspired Moosa and his brother (saying): ‘Take dwellings for your people in Egypt, and make your dwellings as places for your worship, and perform al-salaah, and give glad tidings to the believers.’” [Yoonus 10:87].
Ibn ‘Abbaas said: “They were commanded to take their dwellings as places of prayer [lit. mosques].”
Ibn Katheer said: “This – and Allaah knows best – was because of the intensity of the tribulation that they were facing from Pharaoh and his people. They were commanded to pray much, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): ‘O you who believe! Seek help with patience and prayer…’ [al-Baqarah 2:153], and as it was reported in the hadeeth that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), when he was distressed by something, would pray.”
This explains the importance of worshipping at home, especially at times when the Muslims are in a position of weakness, as happens in some places where the Muslims cannot pray openly in front of the kuffaar. In this context we may think of the mihraab of Maryam, which was her place of worship, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “… Every time Zakariya entered the mihraab to visit her, he found her supplied with sustenance…” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:37]
The Sahaabah (may Allaah be pleased with them) used to be keen to pray at home – apart from the fard or obligatory prayers (which they prayed in congregation in the mosque) – and there is a moving story concerning this. Mahmood ibn al-Rabee’ al-Ansaari reported that ‘Utbaan ibn Maalik – who was one of the Companions of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and was one of the Ansaar who had been present at Badr – came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: “I am losing my sight, and I lead my people in prayer. When it rains, the valley between me and them gets flooded and I cannot get to their mosque to lead them in prayer. O Messenger of Allaah, I would like you to come to come and pray in my house so that I can take it as a place for prayer.” The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “I will do that, in sha Allaah.” ‘Utbaan said: “The next day the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and Abu Bakr came in the morning. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) asked for permission to enter, and I gave him permission. He did not sit down until he entered the house, then he said, ‘Where would you like me to pray in your house?’ I showed him a corner of the house, then the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) stood up, said Takbeer, and we stood in a row behind him, and he prayed two rak’ahs and gave the salaam at the end of the prayer.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 1/519)
(5) Spiritual training for the members of the household
‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to pray qiyaam at night, and when he prayed witr he would say, ‘Get up and pray witr, O ‘Aa’ishah’” (Reported by Muslim, Muslim bi Sharh al-Nawawi, 6/23).
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “May Allaah have mercy on a man who gets up at night and prays, then he wakes up his wife to pray, and if she refuses he throws water in her face.” (Reported by Ahmad and Abu Dawood. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 3488).
Encouraging the women of one's household to give charity is another means of increasing faith. This is something very important which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) encouraged, when he said, “O women! Give in charity, for I have seen that you form the majority of the inhabitants of Hell.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 1/405).
One of the new ideas is to have a box at home for donations to the poor and needy: whatever is put in the box belongs to them, because it is their vessel in the Muslim home.
If the family members see an example among them fasting on al-Ayyaam al-Beed (the 13th, 14th and 15th of each Hijri month), Mondays and Thursdays, Taasoo’aa’ and ‘Aashooraa’ (the 9th and 10th of Muharram), ‘Arafaah, and frequently in Muharram and Sha’baan, this will be a motive for them to do likewise.
(6) Paying attention to adhkaar and Sunnah du’aa’s that have to do with the home
Adkhaar for entering the home:
Muslim reported in his Saheeh that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “When any one of you enters his home and mentions the Name of Allaah when he enters and when he eats, the Shaytaan says: ‘You have no place to stay and nothing to eat here.’ If he enters and does not mention the name of Allaah when he enters, [the Shaytaan] says, ‘You have a place to stay.’ If he does not mention the name of Allaah when he eats, [the Shaytaan says], ‘You have a place to stay and something to eat.’” (Reported by Imaam Ahmad, al-Musnad, 3/346; Muslim, 3/1599).
Abu Dawood reported in his Sunan that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a man goes out of his house and says, ‘Bismillaah, tawakkaltu ‘ala Allaah, laa hawla wa laa quwwata illaa Billaah (In the name of Allaah, I put my trust in Allaah, there is no help and no strength except in Allaah),’ it will be said to him, ‘This will take care of you, you are guided, you have what you need and you are protected.’ The Shaytaan will stay away from him, and another shaytaan will say to him, ‘What can you do with a man who is guided, provided for and protected?’” (Reported by Abu Dawood and al-Tirmidhi. Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 499)
Siwaak
Imaam Muslim reported in his Saheeh that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: “When the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) entered his house, the first thing he would do was use siwaak.” (Reported by Muslim, Kitaab al-Tahaarah, chapter 15, no. 44).
(7) Continuously reciting Soorat al-Baqarah in the house to ward off the Shaytaan
There are a number of ahaadeeth concerning this, such as:
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do not make your houses into graves. The Shaytaan flees from a house in which Soorat al-Baqarah is recited.” (Reported by Muslim, 1/539)
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Recite Soorat al-Baqarah in your houses, for the Shaytaan does not enter a house in which Soorat al-Baqarah is recited.” (Reported by al-Haakim in al-Mustadrak. 1/561; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 1170).
Concerning the virtues of the last two aayaat of this soorah, and the effect of reciting them in one’s house, he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah wrote a document two thousand years before He created the heavens and the earth, which is kept near the Throne, and He revealed two aayaat of it with which He concluded Soorat al-Baqarah. If they are recited in a house for three consecutive nights, the Shaytaan will not approach it.” (Reported by Imaam Ahmad in al-Musnad, 4/274, and others. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 1799).
Islamic Knowledge in the home
(8)Teaching the family
This is an obligation which the head of the household must undertake, in obedience to the command of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones…” [al-Tahreem 66:6]. This aayah is the basic principle regarding the teaching and upbringing of one's family, and enjoining them to do what is good and forbidding them to do what is evil. There follow some of the comments of the mufassireen on this aayah, in so far as it pertains to the duties of the head of the household.
Qutaadah said: “He should command them to obey Allaah, and forbid them to disobey Him, and direct them in accordance with the commands of Allaah, and help them to do that.”
Dahhaak and Muqaatil said: “It is the Muslim’s duty to teach his family, including relatives and female slaves, what Allaah has enjoined upon them and what He has forbidden.”
‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “Teach them and discipline them.”
Al-Tabari (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “We must teach our children and wives the religion and goodness, and whatever they need of good manners. If the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to urge the teaching of female servants, who were slaves, what do you think about your children and wives, who are free?”
Al-Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in his Saheeh: “Chapter: a man’s teaching his female slaves and wife.” Then he quoted the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “There are three who will have two rewards: … a man who has a female slave whom he teaches good manners and teaches her well, and teaches her knowledge, and teaches her well, then he frees her and marries her: he will have two rewards.”
Ibn Hajar (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, commenting on this hadeeth: “The chapter heading refers specifically to female slaves, and to wives by analogy, i.e., teaching one’s free wife about her duties towards Allaah and the Sunnah of His Messenger is more clearly essential than teaching one's female slaves.”
In the midst of all a man’s activities, work and other commitments, he may forget to allow himself time for teaching his wife. One solution to this is to allocate some time for the family, and even for others such as relatives, to hold a study-circle at home. He can let everyone know the time and encourage them to come regularly, so that it will be an ongoing commitment for him and for them. Something similar happened at the time of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
Al-Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Chapter: can the women be given a day exclusively for them to seek knowledge”? and quoted the hadeeth of Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (may Allaah be pleased with him): “The women said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): ‘The men always crowd us out and we cannot reach you, so set aside a day for us when we can come to you.’ So he set aside a day when he would meet them and teach them.”
Ibn Hajar said: “A similar report was narrated by Sahl ibn Abi Saalih from Abu Hurayrah, according to which [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)] said: ‘Your appointment is in the house of so and so,’ and he came to them and spoke to them.’”
What we learn from this is that women should be taught in their houses, and we see how keen the women of the Sahaabah were to learn. Directing teaching efforts to men alone, and not to women, is a serious shortcoming on the part of dai’yahs and heads of households.
Some readers may ask, suppose we set aside a day, and tell our families about it – what should we study in these gatherings? Where do we begin?
I suggest that you begin with a simple program to teach your family in general, and the women in particular, using the following books:
The tafseer of al-‘Allaamah Ibn Sa’di, entitled Tayseer al-Kareem al-Rahmaan fi Tafseer Kalaam al-Mannaan, which is published in seven volumes and is written in an easy style; you can read it or teach somes soorahs and passages from it.
Riyaadh al-Saaliheen – you coul discuss the ahaadeeth quoted, along with the footnotes and the lessons learned from them. You could also refer to the book Nuzhat al-Muttaqeen.
Hasan al-Uswah bimaa thubita ‘an Allaahi wa Rasoolihi fi’l-Nuswah, by al-‘Allaamah Siddeeq Hasan Khaan.
It is also important to teach women some of the ahkaam of fiqh, such as the rulings on tahaarah (purity) and menstrual and post-partum bleeding, salaah, zakaah, siyaam (fasting) and hajj, if she is able to go; some of the rulings on food and drink, clothing and adornment, the sunan al-fitrah, rulings on mahaarim (who is a mahram relative and who is not), rulings on singing and photography, and so on. Among the important sources of such information are the fatwas (rulings or edicts) of the scholars, such as the collections of fatwas by Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz and Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen, and other scholars, whether they are written fatwas or fatwas recorded on tapes.
Another matter that may be included in a syllabus for teaching women and family members is reminding them of lessons or public lectures given by trustworthy scholars and seekers of knowledge which they can attend, so they can have a variety of excellent sources for learning. We should not forget either the radio programs of Idhaa’at al-Qur’aan al-Kareem; another means of teaching is reminding family members of the particular days when women can attend Islamic bookstores, and taking them there, within the guidelines of sharee’ah [i.e., proper hijaab, etc.]
(9)Start building an Islamic “library” in your home
Another thing that will help in teaching your family and letting them develop a understanding of their religion and help them adhere to its rules, is having one’s own Islamic library at home. It does not have to be extensive; what matters is choosing good books, putting them in a place where they are readily accessible, and encouraging family members to read them.
You could put books in a clean and tidy corner of the living room, and in a suitable place in a bedroom or guest room; this will make it easy for any member of the family to read constantly.
In order to build a library properly – and Allaah loves things to be done properly – you should include references so that family members can research various matters and children can use them for their studies. You should also include books of varying levels, so that old and young, men and women can all use them. You should also have books for giving to guests, children’s friends and family visitors, but try to get books that are attractively presented, edited properly and with the sources and classification of the ahaadeeth properly given. You can make the most of Islamic bookstores and exhibitions to build a home library, after consulting and seeking advice from those who have experience in the field of books. One way in which you can help family members to find a book when they want it is to organize the books according to subject, with books of Tafseer on one shelf, books of hadeeth on another, fiqh on a third, and so on. One of the family members could also compile alphabetical or subject indexes of the library, to make it easier to look for books.
Many of those who want to start a home library may ask for titles of Islamic books. Here are a few suggestions:
Tafseer:
Tafseer Ibn Katheer
Tafseer Ibn Sa’di
Zubdat al-Tafseer by al-Ashkar
Badaa’i’ al-Tafseer by Ibn al-Qayyim
Usool al-Tafseer by Ibn ‘Uthaymeen
Lamahaat fi ‘Uloom al-Qur’aan by Muhammad al-Sabbaagh
Hadeeth
Saheeh al-Kalim al-Tayyib
‘Aml al-Muslim fi’l-Yawm wa’l-Laylah (or: Al-Saheeh al-Musnad min Adhkaar al-Yawm wa’l-Laylah)
Riyaadh al-Saaliheen and its commentary Nuzhat al-Muttaqeen
Mukhtasar Saheeh al-Bukhaari by al-Zubaydi
Mukhtasar Saheeh Muslim by al-Mundhiri and al-Albaani
Saheeh al-Jaami’ al-Sagheer
Da’eef al-Jaami’ al-Sagheer
Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb
Al-Sunnah wa Makaanatuhaa fi’l-Tashree’
Qawaa’id wa fawaa’id min al-Arba’een al-Nawawiyyah by Naazim Sultaan
‘Aqeedah
Fath al-Majeed Sharh Kitaab al-Tawheed (edited by al-Arnaa’oot)
A’laam al-Sunnah al-Manshoorah by al-Hakami (ed.)
Sharh al-‘Aqeedah al-Tahhaawiyyah, edited by al-Albaani
The series on ‘Aqeedah by Umar Sulaymaan al-Ashqar in 8 parts
Ashraat al-Saa’ah by Dr. Yoosuf al-Waabil
Fiqh
Manaar al-Sabeel by Ibn Duwiyyaan
Irwa’ al-Ghaleel by al-Albaani
Zaad al-Ma’aad
al-Mughni by Ibn Qudaamah
Fiqh al-Sunnah [also available in English translation]
Al-Mulakhkhas al-Fiqhi by Saalih al-Fawzaan
Collections of fatwas by different scholars (‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz, Muhammad Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen, ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Jibreen)
Sifat Salaah al-Nabi (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) by Shaykh al-Albaani and Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz [available in English under the title The Prophet’s Prayer Described]
Mukhtasar Ahkaam al-Janaa’iz by al-Albaani
Good manners and purification of the soul:
Tahdheeb Madaarij al-Saalikeen
Al-Fawaa’id
Al-Jawaab al-Kaafi
Tareeq al-Hijratayn wa Baab al-Sa’aadatayn
Al-Waabil al-Sayib
Raafi’ al-Kalim al-Tayyib by Ibn al-Qayyim
Lataa’if al-Ma’aarif by Ibn Rajab
Tahdheeb Maw’izat al-Mu’mineen
Ghadhaa’ al-Albaab
Seerah and biographies
Al-Bidaayah wa’l-Nihaayah by Ibn Katheer
Mukhtasar al-Shamaa’il al-Muhammadiyyah by al-Tirmidhi, abridged by al-Albaani
Al-Raheeq al-Makhtoom by al-Mubaarakpoori [available in English translation]
Al-‘Awaasim min al-Qawaasim by Ibn al-‘Arabi, ed. by al-Khateeb and al-Istanbooli
Al-Mujtama’ al-Madani (2 vols.) by Shaykh Akram al-‘Umari [available in English under the title Madinan Society at the Time of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)]
Siyar A’lam al-Nubala’
Minhaj Kitaabat al-Taareekh al-Islaami by Muhammad ibn Saamil al-Salami
There are many other good books on various topics, such as those by:
Shaykh Muhammad ibn ‘Abd al-Wahhaab
Shaykh ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn Naasir al-Sa’di
Shaykh ‘Umar Sulaymaan ibn Ashqar
Shaykh Muhammad ibn Ahmad ibn Ismaa’eel al-Muqaddim
Prof. Muhammad Muhammad Husayn
Shaykh Muhammad Jameel Zayno
Prof. Husayn al-‘Awayishah’s books on al-Raqaa’iq (topics to soften the heart and strengthen eemaan)
Al-Eemaan by Muhammad Na’eem Yaaseen
Al-Walaa’ wa’l-Baraa’ by Shaykh Muhammad Sa’eed al-Qahtaani [available in English translation]
Al-Inhiraafaat al-‘Aqdiyyah fi’l-Qarnayn al-Thaani ‘Ashara wa’l-Thaalith ‘Ashara by ‘Ali ibn Bukhayt al-Zahraani
Al-Muslimoon wa Zaahirat al-Hazeemah al-Nafsiyyah by ‘Abd-Allaah al-Shabaanah
Al-Mar’ah bayn al-Fiqh wa’l-Qaanoon by Mustafa al-Sibaa’i
Al-Usrah al-Muslimah amaam al-video wa’l-tilifiziyon by Marwaan Kijik
Al-Mar’ah al-Muslimah I’daadaatuhaa wa mas’ooliyaatuhaa by Ahmad Abu Bateen
Mas’ooliyat al-Abb al-Muslim fi Tarbiyat Waladihi by ‘Adnaan Baahaarith
Hijaab al-Muslimah by Ahmad al-Baaraazi
Wa Jaa’a Dawr al-Maajoos by ‘Abd-Allaah Muhammad al-Ghareeb
Books by Shaykh Bakr Abu Zayd
Abhaath al-Shaykh Mashoor Hasan Salmaan
There are many other useful, good books – what we have mentioned is only by way of example, and is by no means a complete list. There are also many useful pamphlets and booklets, but it would take too long to list everything. The Muslim should consult others and think hard. Whomever Allaah wishes good for, He helps him to understand His religion.
(10)Home audio library
Having a cassette player in every home may be used for good or for evil. How can we use it in a manner that is pleasing to Allaah?
One of the ways in which we can achieve this is to have a home audio library containing good Islamic tapes by scholars, fuqaha’, lecturers, khateebs and preachers.
Listening to tapes of Qur’aan recitation by some Imaams, for example those recorded during Taraaweeh prayers, will have a great impact on family members, whether by impressing upon them the meanings of the Revelation, or by helping them to memorize Qur’aan because of repeated listening. It will also protect them by letting them hear Qur’aanic recitation rather than the music and singing of the Shaytaan, because it is not right for the words of al-Rahmaan (Allaah) to be mixed with the music of the Shaytaan in the heart of the believer.
Tapes of fatwas may have a great effect on family members and help them to understand various rulings, which will have an impact on their daily lives. We suggest listening to tapes of fatwas given by scholars such as Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz, Shaykh Muhammad Naasir al-Deen al-Albaani, Shaykh Muhammad al-‘Uthaymeen, Shaykh Saalih al-Fawzaan, and other trustworthy scholars.
Muslims must also pay attention to the sources from which they take fatwas, because this is the matter of religion, so look to where you take your religion from. You should take it from someone who is known to be righteous and pious, who bases his fatwas on sound ahaadeeth, who is not fanatical in his adherence to a madhhab, who follows sound evidence and adheres to a middle path without being either extreme or too lenient. Ask an expert. “… Allaah, Most Gracious: ask, then about Him of any acquainted (with such things).” [al-Furqaan 25:59 – interpretation of the meaning – Yusuf Ali’s translation].
Listening to lectures by those who are striving to raise the awareness of the ummah, establish proof and denounce evil, is very important for establishing individual personalities in the Muslim home.
There are many tapes and lectures, and the Muslim needs to know the features of the sound methodology so as to distinguish sound lecturers from others and look for their tapes, which they can listen to with confidence. Among these features are:
The lecturer should be a believer in the ‘aqeedah of the Saved Group, Ahl al-Sunnah wa’l-Jamaa’ah, adhering to the Sunnah and firmly rejecting bid’ah. The speaker should be moderate, neither extremist nor lenient.
He should base his talks on sound ahaadeeth, and beware of weak and fabricated ahaadeeth.
He should have insight into people’s situations and the realities of the ummah, and should offer the appropriate remedy for any problem, giving the people what they need.
He should speak the truth as much as he can, and not utter falsehood or please the people by angering Allaah.
We often find that tapes for children have a great influence on them, whether by helping them to memorize Qur’aan by listening to a young reader, or du’aa’s to be recited at various times of day and night, or Islamic manners, or nasheeds (religious “songs” with no instrumental accompaniment) with a useful message, and so on.
Putting tapes in drawers in an organized fashion will make it easier to find them, and will also protect them from getting damaged or from being played with by young children. We should distribute good tapes by giving or lending them to others after listening to them. Having a recorder in the kitchen will be very useful for the lady of the house, and having a recorder in the bedroom will help a person make good use of time until the last moments of the day.
(11) Inviting good and righteous people and seekers of knowledge to visit the home.
“My Lord! Forgive me, and my parents, and him who enters my home as a believer, and all the believing men and women…” [Nooh 71:28 – interpretation of the meaning].
If people of faith enter your home, it will increase in light (noor), and will bring many benefits because of your conversations and discussion with them. The bearer of musk will either give you some, or you will buy from him, or you will find that he has a pleasant scent. When children, brothers and parents sit with such visitors, and women listen from behind a curtain or screen to what is said, this offers an educational experience to all. If you bring good people into your home, by doing so you keep bad people from coming in a wreaking havoc.
(12) Learning the Islamic rulings with regard to houses.
These include:
Praying in the house
With regard to men, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best of prayer is a man’s prayer in his house – apart from the prescribed prayers.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, no. 731).
It is obligatory to pray (the five daily prayers) in the mosque, except if there is a valid excuse. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) also said: “A man’s voluntary prayers in his house will bring more reward than his voluntary prayers at other people’s places, just as his obligatory prayers with the people are better than his obligatory prayers alone.” (Reported by Ibn Abi Shaybah. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2953).
With regard to women, the deeper inside her home her place of prayer is, the better, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best prayer for women is [that offered] in the furthest part of their houses.” (Reported by al-Tabaraani. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 3311).
A man should not be led in prayer in his own home, and no one should sit in the place where the master of the house usually sits, except with his permission. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A man should not be led in prayer in his place of authority, and no one should sit in his place in his house, except with his permission.” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, no. 2772). I.e., no one should go forward to lead him in prayer, even if they recite Qur’aan better than he does, in a place that he owns or where he has authority, such as a householder in his home, or an imaam in a mosque. Similarly, it is not permitted to sit in the private spot of the head of the master of the house, such as a bed or mattress, etc., except with his permission.
Seeking permission to enter.
“O you who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until you have asked permission and greeted those in them, that is better for you, in order that you may remember. And if you find no one therein, still, enter not until permission has been given. And if you are asked to go back, go back, for it is purer for you. And Allaah is All-Knower of what you do.” [al-Noor 24:27-28 – interpretation of the meaning].
“… so enter houses through their proper doors…” [al-Baqarah 2:189 – interpretation of the meaning].
It is permissible to enter houses that are empty if one has some legitimate business there, such as a house prepared for guests. “There is no sin on you that you enter (without taking permission) houses uninhabited (i.e., not possessed by anybody), (when) you have any interest in them. And Allaah has knowledge of what you reveal and what you conceal.” [al-Noor 24:29 – interpretation of the meaning].
Not feeling too shy to eat in the houses of friends and relatives, and in houses of friends and relatives and others to which one has the keys, if they have no objection to that. “There is no restriction on the blind, nor any restriction on the lame, nor any restriction on the sick, nor on yourselves, if you eat from your houses, or the houses of your fathers, or the houses of your mothers, or the houses of your brothers, or the houses of your sisters, or the houses of your father’s brothers, or the houses of your father’s sisters, or the houses of your mother’s brothers, or the houses of your mother’s sisters, or (from that) whereof you hold keys, or (from the house) of a friend. No sin on you whether you eat together or apart…” [al-Noor 24:61].
Telling children and servants not to barge in to the parents’ bedroom without permission at the times when people usually sleep, i.e., before Fajr, at siesta time and after ‘Isha’, lest they see something inappropriate. If they see something accidentally at other times, this is forgivable, because they are tawwaafeen (those who go about in the house) and it is difficult to stop them. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Let your legal slaves and slave-girls, and those among you who have not come to the age of puberty ask your permission (before they come to your presence) on three occasions: before Fajr prayer, and while you put off your clothes for the noonday (rest), and after the ‘Isha prayer. (These) three times are of privacy for you; other than these times there is no sin on you or on them to move about, - attending (helping) you each other. Thus Allaah makes clear the aayaat (verses of this Qur’aan, showing proofs for the legal aspects of permission for visits, etc.) to you. And Allaah is All-Knowing, All-Wise.” [al-Noor 24:57].
It is forbidden to look into the houses of other people without their permission. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever looks into someone’s house without their permission, put his eyes out, and there is no diyah or qisaas [blood money or retaliation] in this case.” (Reported by Ahmad, al-Musnad, 2/385; Saheeh al-Jaami, 6046).
A woman who has been divorced by talaaq for a first or second time [and could still go back to her husband] should not leave or be made to leave her home during the ‘iddah, and she should still be supported financially. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “O Prophet! When you divorce women, divorce them at their ‘iddah (prescribed periods), and count (accurately) their ‘iddah (periods). And fear Allaah your Lord (O Muslims), and turn them not out of their (husband’s) homes, nor shall they (themselves) leave, except in case they are guilty of some open illegal sexual intercourse. And those are the set limits of Allaah. And whoever transgresses the set limits of Allaah, then indeed he has wronged himself. You (the one who divorces his wife) know not, it may be that Allaah will afterward bring some new thing to pass (i.e., to return her back to you, if this as the first or second divorce).” [al-Talaaq 65:1]
It is permissible for a man to forsake his rebellious wife inside or outside the home, according to the interests prescribed by sharee’ah in any given case. The evidence for forsaking her inside the home is the aayah (interpretation of the meaning): “… refuse to share their beds…” [al-Nisa’ 4:34]. With regard to forsaking women outside the home, this is what happened when the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forsook his wives, leaving them in their apartments and staying in a room outside the houses of his wives. (Reported by al-Bukhaari, Kitaab al-Talaaq, Baab fi’l-Eelaa’).
One should not stay alone overnight in the house. Ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade being alone and said that a man should not stay overnight alone or travel alone. (Reported by Ahmad in al-Musnad, 2/91). This is because of the feelings of loneliness etc., that come from being alone, and also because of the possibility of attacks by enemies or robbers, or the possibility of sickness. If one has a companion, he can help fight off attacks, and can help if one gets sick. (See al-Fath al-Rabbaani, 5/64).
Not sleeping on the roof of a house that has no protecting wall, lest one fall. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever sleeps on the roof of a house that has no protecting wall, nobody is responsible for what happens to him.” (Reported by Abu Dawood, al-Sunan, no. 5041; Saheeh al-Jaami, 6113; its commentary is in ‘Awn al-Ma’bood, 13/384). This is because one who is asleep may roll over in his sleep, and if there is no wall he may fall off the roof and be killed. In such a case, nobody would be to blame for his death; or his negligence would cause Allaah to lift His protection from him, because he did not take the necessary precautions. The hadeeth may mean either.
Pet cats do not make vessels naajis (impure) if they drink from them, or make food naajis if they eat from it. ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Abi Qutaadah reported from his father that water was put out for him to make wudoo’, and a cat came and lapped at the water. He took the water and did wudoo’ with it, and they said, “O Abu Qutaadah! The cat drank from it.” He said, I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: ‘Cats are part of the household, and they are among those who go around in your houses.’” (Reported by Ahmad in al-Musnad, 5/309; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 3694). According to another report he said: “They [cats] are not naajis; they are among those who go around [al-tawwaafeen wa’l-tawwaafaat – refers to children, servants, etc.] in your houses.” (Reported by Ahmad in al-Musnad, 5/309; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2437).
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